Skip to content
April 4, 2016 / diannegray

Something I never do

I was feeling a little weird yesterday. Nothing was doing it for me. I sat down and tried to write with no luck, I tried to watch some TV with no interest, and took to the garden with no energy. I figured it must have been the three week blues hitting right on time after the death of my mother. The same thing happened when my father died. Three weeks on the dot and then three months on the dot after the tragedy I fell in a deep hole.

To pull myself out of this funk I did something I never do – I went for a walk to the creek without the dogs.

I guess you’re wondering why this is something I never do, so I’ll try to give a brief explanation. The dogs scare away nasties like snakes, razorback pigs and large goannas. Most of these creatures won’t hurt you if they hear you coming because they run off into the bush. And, believe me, my dogs (at around 60 kilos) are noisy as they thud around – you can hear them coming for miles.

So I walked off by myself down to the creek, wondering if I was going to creep up on some creature that would be scared by my sudden appearance and jump out to attack.

It was so different without the dogs. Normally they gallop across the ground, over the fields and then dive into the water without a care in the world. But without their riotous behaviour I saw things I’ve never seen before.



Okay – so you probably can’t see the fish, but they were occasionally coming to the surface to catch bugs so the ripples on the water are signs of where they’ve been.

Note before I continue: I upgraded my phone a few months back from Samsung to iPhone and I have to say, the iPhone takes absolutely crappy pictures compared to the Samsung (i.e. I hate it). In future I’ll be taking my old Samsung with me to take pics on my walk.

And then something I’ve never seen before – Blue-tailed Damselflies!


If you can’t see them, they are in the top right hand corner and not very clear (did I tell you I hated this iPhone?) There were about 20 of them flitting across the water, but I just couldn’t get the iPhone to focus clearly on them (and I took about 30 shots).

I climbed down into the waterfall and sat there for a while – something I never do with the dogs because they think it’s cuddle time and try to drown me.


I came home from my walk feeling renewed and ready to take on the world again!

I was planning on taking photos of the new nest of red finches when they fledged, but the little blighters flew the coop before I could capture a few good shots. So instead, I’ll put a pic here of a guy that followed me around when I was down south with my mother.

This guy kept me company when I was away from the farm…


…and every time I saw him he would say “HELLO!” which was a little freaky 😀

***Have a great week***


Leave a Comment
  1. avwalters / Apr 4 2016 8:44 am

    I’m glad to hear that the walk sans dogs, cleared your head and provided glimpses of a world you otherwise don’t get to see. (The phone can’t be all bad, I see the fish.) When my dad passed, I tried to use the blues to focus on the things he gave me–my stubborn streak, a knack for perfectionism and a good sense of humor. What insights will your Mum provide?

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 9:03 am

      It really did clear my head, Alta. My mum gave me a ‘no fear’ attitude. The entire time she was sick and until the end she never had a fear of dying (this actually only occurred to me on my walk, strangely enough). She also gave me a stubborn streak and ‘take control of your own life’ attitude and a feisty nature! Hugs to you xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Photos With Finesse / Apr 4 2016 9:25 am

    I do that too if I’m having a ‘nothing is helping’ day. I’ll throw one (or more than one) of the cameras in the car and just drive! And yes, I leave the dogs behind too – usually because I’m actually hoping to spot wildlife, and have it potentially stick around long enough to have a picture snapped. I usually come back with a clear head and can refocus – on at least one thing. Reading the comment above, your mum sounds a lot like mine. Mine is still with me, but those are the memories that help you get through the tough days. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 9:37 am

      I’m sure it will be the ‘more than one camera’ option for me next time, Suzan 😉 And the dogs just chase things away. I remember seeing a magnificent brolga right in front of me on the dog walk path one day and (of course) the dogs chased it and it flew away before I could get a shot of it – it was huge! I might do more of the ‘alone walk time’ in future when I’m feeling the urge.
      I’m so glad your mum is still with you xxx


      • Photos With Finesse / Apr 4 2016 9:41 am

        Had to go look up a Brolga. I caught my first photo of Sandhill Cranes (similar bird) up here, in the wild, about 18 months ago. It was such a thrill to see. (And the dogs were in the other vehicle with my hubby, at the campground, so they did stick around long enough for me to take more than one shot. 🙂 )

        Liked by 1 person

      • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 1:26 pm

        They are really wonderful to see, Suzan! I’m so glad you got the shot 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  3. JackieP / Apr 4 2016 9:27 am

    That walk sounded like something you needed at the time. I saw the fish and dragonflies! (damselflies!) Beautiful. xxx


    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 9:39 am

      I wasn’t sure what the difference was between the dragonflies and damselflies – but apparently it’s the number of wings they have. It’s the first time I’ve seen them and they looked like little fairies! It was a truely magical scene 😀


      • JackieP / Apr 4 2016 11:25 am

        Huh, I didn’t know the difference either! Now I do. They are magical! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  4. claudiamariefit / Apr 4 2016 9:31 am

    Aloha lovely,

    I loved reading your post and sometimes when I feel like I am in a funk and try to get myself out there, I do exactly the same…I try to do something different. I love the fact that you were able to see all those beautiful things which were different than when you are out with the dogs. Life is about being in the moment and pausing for a while and admiring the little wonders around us. The cockatoo made me guess that you live in OZ? One of my fav places in the whole world (I traveled around OZ for a year and also lived in Cairns for 4 years 🙂

    If you are interested in some more travel posts and want to get inspired yourself, check out my newest post I published today and follow me on my blog. I wrote about how I fell in love with the Hawaiian islands and made it the home of my heart. I would love to hear from you!

    I will also write about interesting topics including my 60lbs weight loss (and get strong and healthy) journey, beauty, fitness, discovering different places around our little planet and different types of cuisines.

    I hope to see you on my blog:-)

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 1:25 pm

      Sounds wonderful, Claudia – thanks for making contact 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      • claudiamariefit / Apr 4 2016 2:11 pm

        Oh my goodness I just saw that you are from Australia and that you have written so many interesting sounding books. I will def check out your site and if you are interested you are very welcome to share your thoughts on my blog as well.

        I am wishing you a wonderful day!


        Liked by 1 person

      • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:06 am

        Thanks, Claudia – I’m so glad you’re following my blog! 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Carrie Rubin / Apr 4 2016 9:49 am

    Good for you. I’m glad the walk was uplifting for you and not scary. You’ve been through a rough time. A little self-exploration without scary creatures is in order!

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 1:28 pm

      For some reason there are always scary creatures in my life, Carrie – I think it must be my lot to get use to them. At the moment there is a snake in the wall in my bedroom – I’m trying to convince hubby to get it out (but he needs a LOT of convincing 😀


      • Carrie Rubin / Apr 4 2016 8:48 pm

        Oh my, I would never sleep again were that my case!

        Liked by 1 person

      • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:10 am

        Heeee – it’s a very friendly critter, but I don’t think I’d be happy if it came out of that wall 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      • Carrie Rubin / Apr 5 2016 10:00 am


        Or should I say, Hiss!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Theo Fenraven / Apr 4 2016 9:52 am

    Damselflies are common in WI, but I don’t see them as often in south Florida. I miss them. They’re small and exquisite and beautiful. About the dogs? Sometimes I take a walk without Suki–not often, but it happens–and I enjoy it because, as you say, one sees things one ordinarily doesn’t with a furry creature bouncing around. Suki’s pretty good about freezing when I tell her to, though, so I can take pictures. How she learned that, I’ll never know. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 1:30 pm

      Suki is your soul mate 😀 I wish I could tell my dogs to freeze sometimes (particularly last week when they chased a snake). Damselflies are so beautiful like little fairies – I was intrigued and just watched them for ages xxx


  7. raphaela99 / Apr 4 2016 10:15 am

    I am thinking of you. So glad that you went for a restorative walk. It helps. Xxx


    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 1:31 pm

      Thank you so much, my dear – you’re a sweetheart xxxx


  8. Jacqui Murray / Apr 4 2016 10:52 am

    Ho wonderful the walk rejuvenated you. I usually end up reading, but it has to be an excellent book, not just one I’m trying out. I have the new Jeffrey Deaver I’m saving for just that occasion.


  9. agjorgenson / Apr 4 2016 12:05 pm

    And a blessed week to you as well! I often find walks to be a tonic, but like all tonics different ones cure different ills. Glad you found the one you needed.


  10. nrhatch / Apr 4 2016 1:01 pm

    Nature nurtures.
    So do dogs . . . but they are noisier, messier, and more boisterous.

    Glad the walk provided some clarity.
    Life (and death) are challenging at times ~ it great when we give ourselves just what we need.


    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 1:34 pm

      It’s exactly what I needed, Nancy (even though I didn’t realise it at the time). I felt so rejuvenated on my return – I should do it more often 😉


  11. Pagadan / Apr 4 2016 2:01 pm

    What a lovely walk! Thanks for sharing the photos.


    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 2:05 pm

      Thanks so much for coming over to take a look, Joy! It’s always lovely to see you here 😀


  12. Pagadan / Apr 4 2016 2:02 pm

    I love dragonflies, especially when they’re flying in a pattern,


    • diannegray / Apr 4 2016 2:05 pm

      These ones liked like little fairies – so sweet!


  13. davidprosser / Apr 4 2016 4:52 pm

    I’m glad you weren’t attacked by the nasties during your walk Dianne and that it did you good. The three week blues can be awful but you seem to have found the perfect remedy. At least next time you can do it for pleasure and not because the blues have hit.
    I hope you’re back on top form now and able to write again.
    xxx Sending Massive Hugs xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:07 am

      You’re wonderful, David! and thank you so much for the tweet 😀
      xxx Massive Hugs Back at You xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  14. ramblingsfromamum / Apr 4 2016 6:40 pm

    I saw the fish, I saw the Damselflies. Time by yourself, without your fur kids was needed. Being reflective about how your life was, how it is now. I believe you’re friend who kept saying hello was that someone special whom you are missing right now. Walk when you get stuck, you have such a beautiful place to venture out in. Hugs and love ❤️ xx


    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:09 am

      Thanks so much, Jen. You’re right about the bird – I often get them ‘talking’ to me at times when things are stressful. I don’t think I’m nuts, but it seems to happen quite a lot! Big ‘strength hugs’ to you my darling xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

      • ramblingsfromamum / Apr 5 2016 9:40 pm

        Mine are Kookaburras… When my younger brother passed over 10 years ago, 2 Kookas sat on top of the Gazebo at his Memorial, as I read my words to him. The Monet I stopped reading, they flew away. Now I hear one and say “Hello Paul” and have a chat. No you’re not nuts sweetheart, just intuitive. Thank you, need strength hugs ~ my heart to yours 💕 xxxx

        Liked by 1 person

  15. the eternal traveller / Apr 4 2016 8:56 pm

    Hang in there Dianne. It sounds like a quiet walk was what you needed.

    I have a Samsung Galaxy and it does take good photos.


    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:12 am

      Hang on that Samsung Galaxy 😉 And yes, you’re right – that walk was exactly what I needed xxxx


  16. Jill Weatherholt / Apr 4 2016 9:18 pm

    I’m happy the walk was good for you, Dianne. Your photos are beautiful! I especially enjoyed the dragon flies and of course, the friendly bird…he’s cute~

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:13 am

      The creatures around here are just wonderful, Jill and somehow have the ability to lift the spirits. No wonder I’m such an animal lover 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Zen A. / Apr 4 2016 10:34 pm

    Yay you’re a Samsung fan! Haha, sorry I had to say that. Samsung really takes the best pictures.

    That cockatoo is so cute! Though I admit I would be intimidated if someone were to suddenly screech “HELLO” at me when I was least expecting it. I take late night walks too, but my area is very safe so I never have to worry about creatures crawling out at me. Though I do see a lot of people walking around their dogs and I have to resist the urge to go up to each one and cuddle them.

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:16 am

      I could just imagine you running up to puppies and cuddling them, Zen! What a wonderful thought 😀
      I am so much a Samsung fan. I’ve decided to take my old phone now when I walk because it’s THAT GOOD 😀


  18. anotherday2paradise / Apr 5 2016 1:56 am

    I love your cute companion, Dianne. So glad your walk helped to lift your spirits. I remember after my mom died in September, that some days I felt quite aimless, and often cried over nothing in particular. Your blue-tailed Damselflies show up really well. How beautiful they are! I hope your dogs have forgiven you for going off without them. 🙂 xx


    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:20 am

      It’s the ‘crying over nothing in particular’ that really gets me too, Sylvia. It’s so hard to control.
      The blue-tailed Damselflies were absolutely beautiful and for several moments it felt like I was surrounded by tiny blue fairies (they were probably just happy that the dogs hadn’t chased them away from the water). I’m sure the dogs will forgive me one day 😉 xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Charissa / Apr 5 2016 3:27 am

    I’m glad to hear you say that about the iPhone. I was jealous that I didn’t have one, but the only reason I wanted one was because I’d heard the cameras were good in them. I’ll turn my focus to Samsung now. Sorry about your melancholy. It’s hard to move on when we’re missing our loved ones. Glad you walked through it…and shared your discoveries again. I think if a bird kept saying Hello to me, I might just die laughing.


    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:24 am

      It was hard for me not to die laughing at that bird, Char. Cockatoos are renowned for their ability to learn human words so I’m thinking someone must have been yelling ‘HELLO’ at that bird for years 😉
      Yes – definitely the Samsung. I wish I’d never switched now, but I still have my old phone so that’s what I’ll be using from now on 😀


      • Charissa / Apr 6 2016 5:08 am

        So cool about the cockatoo. And I’m sorry about your new cruddy phone. So sad.

        Liked by 1 person

  20. danniehill / Apr 5 2016 6:15 am

    I have heard deep hurts turn to happiness after a long period of time. I don’t think that is true, but for me my thoughts of my Dad are only of the good times I had with him. The bad have faded away. I feel your pain.
    In Thailand I usually walked with my dogs, for the same reason, but the times I went alone I saw so much more of nature. One thing though, I always carried a nice bamboo stick to deal with the cobras and such. One occasion I was walking along a path in dense growth and heard what sounded like a horse coming at me. A larger, 7 feet, water monitor came roaring down the path and thank goodness it totally ignored me because the dogs were hot on its tail. No pictures just a quick check to make sure my heart was still working.

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:30 am

      Good grief – that water monitor would have scared the daylights out of me, Dannie – you did very well to remain calm-ish! I carry a cane knife (better known as a machete) with me, although I don’t know how effective it would be in an emergency, but better than nothing I guess 😉

      Thank you for the kind words, pain of loss is such an awful thing, but we all go through it and people say things like ‘deep hurts turn to happiness after a long period of time’ just to make us feel better, but I agree with you that this isn’t necessarily so.

      Thank you so much for the tweet xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Philosophical Epiphanies / Apr 5 2016 7:06 am

    I just started blogging last week, and it is a pleasure that I came across your blog.
    It has inspired me to start my second article.
    Thank you:)

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Apr 5 2016 9:31 am

      What a wonderful comment – thank you! and thank you for coming by and commenting – I’ll keep an eye out for your second article 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  22. Polysyllabic Profundities / Apr 5 2016 7:41 am

    I’m glad you took some time just for you. It really is cleansing. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Britt Skrabanek / Apr 5 2016 1:52 pm

    Sweet Dianne, I’m so happy that walk was such a healing experience for you. Amazing how a little change in our routine can reset the mind and help us see the world in a new light. xo


  24. restlessjo / Apr 5 2016 4:57 pm

    Well, how could you not smile at a bird as cute as that? 🙂 🙂 I’ve seen those damselflies and they’re not easy to capture at the best of times. Glad you could pick yourself up and get out there, Dianne. The dogs loss was your gain. 🙂 Wishing you a happy week!


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:46 pm

      Thanks, Jo! The week has been getting better and better – now time for writing 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  25. pommepal / Apr 5 2016 7:59 pm

    What an interesting and restorative walk for you Dianne. Little steps doing something different and pleased you felt better when you got back home. Is the cockatoo a pet, he looks so friendly.


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:47 pm

      They were everywhere in Canberra, Pauline. In big groups so I don’t think this one was a pet – maybe he wanted to be 😉


      • pommepal / Apr 8 2016 7:46 pm

        Feed them and you have a friend for life (or until the noisy minors chase them away!!!)

        Liked by 1 person

  26. mcwoman / Apr 5 2016 11:00 pm

    I’m happy a walk through nature made you feel better. We have no interesting parks where I live, but a walk through a garden center helps me with emotional balance. Isn’t interesting we both search out the same to center us? Sending love to you. Barb


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:49 pm

      Thanks so much, Barb. I really hope things are going well for you – sending love and hugs xxx


  27. Kate Johnston / Apr 6 2016 3:01 am

    I’m so happy that you were able to clear your head of those blues. Nature is a wondrous thing, ain’t it? You’re lucky to live in such a great place for a walk, and to see all kinds of critters. I can imagine it’s as soothing as much as it is revitalizing!


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:50 pm

      A big injection of the great outdoors can do wonders, Kate. I’m very lucky indeed and appreciate every day I’m here xxxx


  28. EllaDee / Apr 6 2016 4:50 pm

    Love the pics 🙂 Doing something just for you rewarded you magically. As the weather cools will there be less likelihood of encountering snakes etc? Maybe the dogs could let you go on a few more solo walks. It will be like exploring a whole new neighbourhood.
    I was overjoyed to chuck the crappy Telstra branded blue tick phone we tried out to get ever elusive coverage at TA, and revert to Samsung… however I can no longer blame crappy photography on the phone.


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:54 pm

      The snakes will definitely drop off as the weather cools (which is fantastic) and I won’t be jumping at every black stick I see 😉 haaa – although one of those ‘black sticks’ was actually a snake one day a few weeks back, yikes – hubby nearly trod on it 😉


  29. tchistorygal / Apr 7 2016 3:21 am

    Hi Dianne, losing you mom takes a while to process, and for me it hit me again when others lost someone close. How do you pay homage or adjust to missing the person most responsible for giving you life? Your life is your tribute to her. Every accomplishment you know she is cheering you on, beaming with pride that you are her daughter. Just imagine the glow coming from her. 😍😍😍


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:56 pm

      There is a lot of that there, Marsha and thank you so much for the timely reminder. My life really is a tribute to her and I thank her so much for that xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

  30. Susan A Eames / Apr 7 2016 4:05 am

    What a beautiful, poignant post, Dianne. Bereavement takes time, but you’re handling it remarkably. xx


    • diannegray / Apr 8 2016 3:57 pm

      Thanks, Susan. I know we need to go through ‘stages’ but that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier. It’s lovely to know you love this post and that support is all around me xxxx


  31. roughwighting / Apr 8 2016 9:16 pm

    I had the exact same thing happen to me when my dad died. I thought I was fine and then three weeks later I hit a wall. I think your response by going for a walk with and in nature was and is the perfect answer. XO


    • diannegray / Apr 10 2016 6:34 am

      It’s an odd wall to hit and I knew it was coming because it had happened to me before, just like you. But I still wasn’t fully prepared for it and luckily I just ‘took off’ (which I think is the best thing to do sometimes!) hugs xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

      • roughwighting / Apr 11 2016 9:17 pm

        YES, I think we need to go ‘outside’ ourselves, and our regular routine, to mourn and then remember with gratitude.

        Liked by 1 person

  32. Andrea Stephenson / Apr 10 2016 6:28 am

    I know that feeling of not knowing what to do that will help, but it sounds like you did the right thing in the end to just give yourself some space.


  33. ParentingIsFunny / Apr 11 2016 7:40 am

    I’m so glad you took your walk. A little time in nature is so refreshing. Sorry your phone is causing you problems though. Your dogs sound delightful, the big thugs! 🙂


    • diannegray / Apr 11 2016 8:29 am

      Haaa – my dogs really are thugs 🙂 The walk was lovely and not only pulled me out of my funk but gave me the inspiration for a short story xxx


  34. Amy Reese / Apr 11 2016 8:32 am

    Good for you for getting out for yourself. I can see the dogs helping you with suspicious critters, but you need to take of them too. A walk for yourself. It sounds like that was the just the ticket. Walking helps me too. What kind of iPhone do you have? I’m curious. My iPhone6 is ok but it doesn’t take good close ups. I wonder what’s in the number 3 after you lose someone. Hmm. Hang in there, Dianne. xox


    • diannegray / Apr 11 2016 8:54 am

      It’s an iPhone5 and so difficult to take close-ups (which is what I do most of the time). Long distance pics are good, but I’m now taking my old Samsung for walks and I got a few good shots yesterday.

      I’m not sure why the number 3 comes up, but I was warned when my father died and was hit three days, weeks and months afterward. Maybe it’s the time it takes our brain to analyze the shock. It would be interesting to find out. xxx

      Liked by 1 person

      • Amy Reese / Apr 11 2016 8:56 am

        I have an iPhone6 and it’s not very good with the closeups either. Just so you know. Maybe the 7 will be better.
        It would interesting to know. Hmm…

        Liked by 1 person

  35. Minuscule Moments / Apr 29 2016 7:30 am

    Dianne I can’t imagine finding the muse amongst grief. The days vary, so up and down. I hope you can heal with these walks with nature. Life is so unpredictable and we all need to slow down and just remember to breathe. Thinking of you and don’t force the writing, it will come when its ready. You have such a gift. Im betting stories filter through your head as you walk.

    Liked by 1 person

  36. Cynthia Reyes / Apr 30 2016 9:55 am

    Nice post. You saw some new things! And was that a parrot, the white bird?


    • diannegray / May 1 2016 10:20 am

      The white bird is a cockatoo, Cynthia – they’re very talkative and cen be really naughty 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  37. beeblu / Jul 10 2016 7:22 am

    Grief catches us without warning, doesn’t it?

    An encounter with a razorback pig would scare the hell out of me!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Jul 10 2016 8:55 am

      Grief certainly has a way of catching us unaware 😦

      And yes – me too for the razorback! Luckily I’ve avoided them to this point (touch wood) 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  38. beeblu / Jul 10 2016 7:24 am

    I read your comment about your mum not being afraid of dying, Dianne. That is a wonderful gift of comfort.

    Liked by 1 person

    • diannegray / Jul 10 2016 8:55 am

      She was so brave and ready to go. I hope I’m that brave when my time comes xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: